Radiographers Group
عمومی گروه
عمومی گروه
فعال 8 ماه پیش
زیر گروه رادیولوژی زبان آموزان OET
عمومی گروه
پاسخ به: تصحیح رایتینگ های رادیولوژی
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▇ Errors ▇ Suggestions ▇ Rephrased
Dear Dr. Leah,
Re: The lumbar x-ray’s request of Mr. Max Smith
I am writing to provide information regarding (a patient of yours) Mr. Smith, one of your patients, (a) 54-year-old male with a history of consistent lower back pain for the past five months. He has undergone 2 lumbar x-rays, separately, on 01/01/2021 and 3 (three) months later.
After Verifying Mr. Smith’s identification and his medical history, I confirmed that he has undergone (underwent) 2 (two) x-ray procedures which (both of which) showed no signs of pathologies (pathology). Additionally, Mr. Smith expressed (reported) no changes in his condition during this period. Given these factors, along with no (without requesting) new position view (radiographic view/imaging position or technique) request (such as oblique view) and the radiologist’s consultation (consulting with radiologist), I advised him that the repetitive x-ray (a repeat X-ray) seems unnecessary; however, he angrily argued that the new radiograph is crucial for his appropriate treatment.
Initially, Mr. Smith expressed his uncertainty (was uncertain) over (about) providing accessibility for you (providing you access) to his previous doctors’ records, (.) but (,) after I explained the hazards of excessive x-ray exposure, he gave his consent for you to access his medical images archived by his former doctor. (he consented to your access to his previous medical images.)
I hope this information will assist you with Mr. Smith’s concerns and treatment.
If you need any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully,
Radiographer
جملات رو خیلی ساده تر می تونید بنویسید ولی اکثرا سخت و wordy هستند. کلمات اضافی رو حذف کنید. این سبک نوشتن هم سخت تره هم احتمال خطا رو میبره بالا. هم خوانایی کمتری داره و نمره کمتری میگیره.
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Purpose 3/3
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Content 6/7
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Clarity 4/7
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Genre & Style 3/7
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Organization and layout 5/7
- Language 4/7
B Overall score: (370)
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